Fearless? Fear less!

I fear so many things, I am afraid of the dark ,of talking in the mass ,of dying alone, of not being good enough . I am afraid to look dumb. Afraid I will never find true love.Afraid to be asked “how can someone as cheerful as you feel that way ?” ,it was the answer to my question I got all the time.I am tired of people letting me down that I get altitude sickness  just from standing up for myself.As we were told ”stand up for yourself!!”.And that’s hard to do if you dont know who you are.

This has been a part of our upbringing I guess. We were expected to define ourselves at such an early age. But if we didn’t others did it for us “Geek, dumbo, fatty, ugly “. We were told what we must have a dream, an aim, a path we need to choose, they still kept asking  “What do you wanna be when you grow up”.I always thought it was an unfair question. Doesn’t  It presupposes, you can’t be what you already are. We were kids. When I was a kid all I wanted to grow up and pay all my bills, fall in love, get married, have kids, now not that much. When I was a kid I wanted to buy remote-controlled cars with all my money. When I was 12 I wanted to become a teacher, when I was 13 I felt like killing them all. When I was 14, I wanted to be a doctor when I was 15 I realized I couldn’t control my own heartbeat when I saw him every time and I was like “NO Thank you!! what kind of doctor would I become! “  When I was 16 they asked me to choose a serious career path I said I wanted to be a writer and they said to choose something realistic So I said, “an Astronaut” and they said, “Don’t be stupid!” See, They asked me what I wanted to be and told me what not to be. And I wasn’t the only one.

We were told that we somehow must become what we are not, sacrificing what we are, to inherit the masquerade of what we will be. I was being told to accept the identity that others will give me. And I have wondered what made my dream too easy to dismiss. Granted my dreams were shy because they were a little too girlish than I was. My dreams were self-conscious and overly apologetic. They were standing alone in the crowd and never been noticed. My dreams got called names tooSilly, foolish, impossible but I kept dreaming. I was going to be become a astronaut  I had it all figured out. I was going to fly to other planets leaving them all behind.

Sometimes I feel being drug-free has less to do with addiction and more to do with sanity. I wasn’t the only kid that grew up this way. Now I realise why did we keep supporting the underdogs? Because we see ourselves in them. Somewhere within your heart, there’s a voice shouting and cheering that you can do it. That is the only supporter you got and only supporter you need. Time to let the underdog within you face the glory. Let it shine set it free. Be the voice!!! Cheer up you got this.

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